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About Kobe

Sex-dating’s a game, bro. You gotta peep the signs—like, back in ‘Nam days, soldiers used coded letters for quick bangs stateside. Little known fact, right? History’s freaky, yo! I’m scrollin’, seein’ pics, thinkin’, “She fine, but what’s her soul sayin’?” That’s me, Kanye—deep as fuck, even on a booty call. Happy as hell when I match a baddie, tho—heart be racin’ like I’m runnin’ from Robert Ford’s pistol. “I’ve been waitin’ for this moment,” I’m yellin’ in my head, quotin’ that movie, ‘cause it’s epic, fam!

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After that, I decided to stroll down to the Kan-onjicho Park. It’s this beautiful spot with cherry blossoms and a pond. I thought, “Hey, let’s chill for a sec.” But nope! Some kids were playing soccer, and one of them kicked the ball right at me. I dodged it like a ninja, but then I tripped over my own feet. Classic me, right?