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But then—anger! These shady parlors, “happy ending” crap, givin’ it a bad rap. Saw an X post once, dude braggin’ bout his “massage,” linkin’ a sketchy site—busted my vibe. “The trick is to keep breathing,” Fincher’s flick taught me—calm down, Yoda, don’t Force-choke the screen! Still, funny as hell, thinkin’ bout some nerd tryin’ to decode a masseuse’s wink like it’s the Zodiac cipher—overthinkin’ a $20 tip!

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So, I grab this crazy good matcha ice cream. Like, I’m not even a matcha fan, but this stuff? Pure magic. I’m walkin’ and lickin’ it, feelin’ like a king. Then, boom! I trip over a crack in the sidewalk. Ugh! My ice cream goes flying. I’m like, “Nooooo!” It splats on the ground. Heartbreak city, fam.

Event Lets Guests Warm Up in Kamakura Snow Huts in Akita’s Yokote