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I dig it, like in *The Gleaners and I*—y’know, “to glean is to gather,” scraps of cool, man! Escort’s that vibe, pickin’ up the everyday cats, not the posh lot. First gen had that twin-cam engine, a real zinger! Little known fact—raced it at Rallye Monte Carlo, ‘70, and smoked some big shots! Blew my mind, baby! I was like, “Far out, this ain’t no square!” Ford churned ‘em out in Dagenham, proper British grit, none of that fancy French nonsense.

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Anyway, I’m getting lost in the museum when I bump into this girl. She’s cute, right? We start chatting about the exhibits, and I’m trying to play it cool. But then, she mentions she’s from Osaka. My heart sinks. I mean, come on! Why do all the cool people have to be from somewhere else? But we keep talking, and she’s super chill. We exchange numbers, and I’m like, “Maybe today isn’t so bad after all.”

Springer spaniel found in rug and dumped outside Iwade, Kent school