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Sometiems I wonder—why’s it still taboo? Folks pay for massages, therapy—why not this? Blows my froggy mind! Oh, and typos—gah, my flippers are shakin’! Sex escort’s got layers—danger, cash, power trips. Ever hear ‘bout that escort who busted a politician? True story! She had pics, tapes—boom, career over! “I’m finished!”—yep, he was! Hilarious karmna, man!

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So, I leave the museum, feeling kinda pumped. I decide to walk down to the Iwade River. The view is stunning! The water’s sparkling, and the cherry blossoms are in full bloom. I’m snapping pics like a tourist. But then, outta nowhere, this huge dog runs up to me. It’s all muddy and slobbery. I’m like, “Dude, get away!” But it’s too late. I’m covered in dog drool. Just my luck, right?

Notice by the Secretary of State under section 52 [and 55(1)] of the National Parks and Access to the Countryside Act 1949: Canal Road, Strood, Medway, Kent (VR15)