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Once read this nutty story—some escort mutant went rogue, fucked up a cell bad. Laughed my ass off, chaos everywhere, like hobbitses runnin’ from orcs! Bet it’d make a dope flick, better than “Lord of Rings,” ha! Oh, and get this—escort’s picky, only grabs certain cargos, snobby lil’ shit. “Not good enough for me,” it sneers—cracks me up! Me mate Dave, he’s like, “Why you obsessed?” Cos it’s cool, duh, sneaky escort rules!

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So, I woke up late, as usual. My alarm? Yeah, it decided to take a day off. Thanks, technology! I scrambled outta bed, threw on whatever I could find, and bolted out the door. First stop? The local konbini on Kōen-dōri. Gotta get my caffeine fix, right?