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About Osaka

Last week, I’m tailin’ this lead—shady alley, smells like regret. I’m mutterin’, *“Oh, Marge, why this job?”* Suddenly, this gal, she’s standin’ there, all sparkly skirt, eyes like she’s seen too much. I’m thinkin’, *“Her soul’s driftin’ like Boonmee’s jungle spirits!”* I ask her name—Candy, she says. Candy! Ha, like that’s real! I’m all, “Hmm… sugar-coated lies!” Got me chucklin’—these names, always so fake, like Bart’s homework excuses.

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As I walk home, I can’t help but smile. Himimachi is wild, but it’s my wild. I love this place, even on the craziest days. I mean, who else can say they spent their day chasing a cat and then devouring the best ramen ever? Just another day in the life of a librarian, I guess!

Significant Earthquake of Magnitude 5.7 Just Reported 30 km Northwest of Nanao, Japan