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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—witty, half-drunk, “I drink and I know things.” So, we’re talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, eh? Picture this: I’m stumblin’ down some dark, twisty street—kinda like *Mulholland Drive*, all moody and fucked-up, right? “What’s my name?” I mutter, half-laughin’, ‘cause I’m three wines deep and the night’s a bloody riddle. Findin’ a prossie ain’t just a quick shag—it’s a game, a hunt, and I’m the clever bastard who sees the strings.

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Then, I wandered over to the beach. The waves were crashing, and I felt so free. I kicked off my shoes and just ran into the water. It was cold, but refreshing. I was laughing like a kid. But then, I got splashed by a wave. My phone was in my pocket! Nooo! I was freaking out!

North Delta Grade 8s get a hand-delivered start to the school year