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Once hooked up with this bird—total minx. She’s all “let’s keep it light,” then bam! Cries mid-shag bout her ex. I’m like, “Mate, I ain’t yer shrink!” Shoulda seen her face—priceless. Sex-dating’s a fuckin circus, Clarice… clowns everywhere. “Blessed are the forgetful,” movie says—wish I could erase that night, hah!

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So, I’m signing away, and these kids are just so full of energy. One kid, Yuki, he’s like a little tornado. He kept asking me to sign “superhero” over and over. I’m like, “Dude, I’m trying to keep up here!” But he was relentless. So, I started signing “superhero” with dramatic flair. You know, arms flying, big gestures. The kids loved it! I felt like a rockstar for a sec.