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It’s showtime! Yo, lemme tell ya bout sex escorts, man, like straight up wild shit from "The Wolf of Wall Street"! I’m ringin’ up sodas at the counter, but my brain’s stuck on escorts, ya know? These chicks, they’re like the fuckin’ Quaaludes of the night—smooth, pricey, and get ya high as fuck! I seen ‘em, struttin’ in heels higher than my rent, makin’ cash I can’t even dream of behind this shitty register.

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Yuigahama Street. Gotta grab my morning onigiri, ya know? But guess what? They were out of my fave flavor—salmon! Ugh, like, how do you run out of salmon? It’s a konbini, not a gourmet restaurant! I settled for some weird tuna mayo thing. Not the same, man.

‘Shocking’ sushi character named most memorable mascot in Japan