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What surprises me? How chill some are about it. Like, I’d be freaking out, but they’re all, “It’s just work, Kimmy.” Makes me think of Yi Yi again—“Life is a mixture of sad and happy things.” So true! I’m, like, wow, they’re living that line. Oh, and get this—some escorts have code words for creepy dudes, like “pineapple” means “get me outta here!” Cracks me up, but also, like, stay safe, babes!

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So, I call it in. “Hey, we got a situation on Yoshida-dōri. Truck down, driver confused.” My boss is like, “What do you mean confused?” I’m like, “I dunno, man! He thought he was in a different city!”