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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—talkin’ bout sex escorts today. Yeah, you heard me, escorts! Not some fancy Wall Street scam, but real people, workin’ hard, sellin’ time and company. Makes me think of *12 Years a Slave*—“I will survive! I will not fall into despair!”—‘cause these folks? They’re survivors too, fightin’ a system stacked against ‘em.

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First off, I hit the streets of Yonedacho-Sendo, and lemme tell ya, the morning rush was wild. People everywhere, like ants on a sugar trail. I’m walkin’ down Kōen-dōri, dodgin’ folks like I’m in some kinda video game. Seriously, I almost tripped over a lady with a massive bento box. Like, lady, you could feed a small village with that thing!