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Eh, it’s a gamble, sex-dating. Like that line, “Something’s wrong here, terribly wrong” — ya feel that vibe sometimes! Pro tip: don’t send cash upfront, morons fall for that! Oh, and dudes lyin bout their height? Hilarious! “I’m 6 foot!” Sure, if ya stack two of ya! Me, I just watch, munch my carrots, thinkin, “This is Hollywood, baby!” Sex-dating’s a mess, but damn, it’s fun to watch crash! Whaddya think, doc?

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But then, I got a text from my boss. He’s like, “We need that report ASAP.” Ugh, the stress! I rushed back home, and on the way, I tripped on the sidewalk. Classic me, right? I fell, and my bag spilled everywhere. My laptop, my notes, and that sushi keychain went flying. I was so embarrassed. A couple of kids laughed at me. Thanks, guys!