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But—oh, man—sometimes escort pisses me off! Last month, this rookie escort forgot the route—FORGOT! My crates of fancy wine sat there, sweatin’ in the sun, while he’s scratchin’ his head. “Wanna know how I got these scars?” I yelled—kiddin’, didn’t say that, but I wanted to! Cost me a grand to reroute. Chaos, pure chaos, and not the fun kind.

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Body rubs and erotic massage in Yamada, Iwate Prefecture, are a delightful way to unwind after a long day. This charming coastal town is known for its stunning views of the Pacific Ocean and .

Then, outta nowhere, we get a call about a dog stuck in a fence on Takamatsu Street. I’m like, “What is this, a sitcom?” So, I grab my stuff and head over. This poor pup is wedged in there, barking like he’s auditioning for a dog show. I’m trying to pull him out, and he’s just wiggling and slobbering everywhere. I’m covered in mud, and I’m like, “This is NOT in my job description!”

Interior fire self-extinguishes at Yamada North America in South Charleston