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My precious! Sexual-massage, yesss, tricksy stuff! We loves it, don’t we, hmm? Makes us tingle, like Jep Gambardella strollin’ Rome in “The Great Beauty”. So fancy, so lush – “this is how it always ends,” he’d say, all moody-like. Me, I’m sittin’ here, raspy throat, thinkin’ bout them oily hands slidin’ everywhere. Sneaky fingers, precious, workin’ knots out – or in, heh!

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Next, I head over to the Wakkanai Park. It’s beautiful, man. Cherry blossoms everywhere! I’m snapping pics like a tourist. But then, I see this kid with a kite. He’s running around, and I’m thinking, “That’s cute.” But then, the kite gets stuck in a tree. Classic! The kid’s crying, and I’m like, “C’mon, it’s just a kite!” But I get it. I mean, I’d be upset too if my dreams were tangled in a tree.

Hokkaido: Film shines light on life with Russians after WWII