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About Fukuoka

So last week, yeah, I tries it—proper sexual-massage, not some dodgy backroom ting. Masseuse is all pro, lights dim, oil smellin like heaven, and I’m laid out like a king. She’s workin me back, and I’m like, “There’s no returnin now!”—straight outta Ida, that line! Felt reborn, fam, no cap. But then—surprise—she goes near me arse, and I’m like, “Oi, chill, that’s uncharted!” Laughed me head off, tho—awkward but jokes.

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So, I’m all sticky and annoyed, and I decide to head to the Wakimachi Castle ruins. I mean, it’s supposed to be this historical spot, right? But when I get there, it’s just a bunch of rocks. Like, where’s the castle? I’m lookin’ around like a lost puppy. I swear, if I see one more rock today, I’m gonna lose it.

Why the spiritual and secluded Iya Valley should be your next Japanese getaway