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About Nagoya

So I hit the streets, right? Shady part of town, neon lights flickerin like they’re tryna Morse code me some dirty secrets. I’m thinkin, “The cipher’s in the streets, man!”—straight outta *Zodiac*. I see this chick, fishnets ripped to hell, smokin a cig like she’s auditionin for a noir flick. I’m like, “Hey, you workin?” She squints at me, all sassy, “What’s it to ya, grandma?” Grandma?! Bitch, I’m Tina fuckin Fey, I’ll roast you from here to Siberia! Got me heated, but I laughed—props for guts, ya know?

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After the ceremony, we strolled around the park. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom. I mean, it was gorgeous! I took a million pics for my Insta. Gotta keep the followers happy, ya know? But then, I tripped over a root. Classic me. I fell right into a patch of flowers. I was like, “Great, now I’m a flower girl.”

Robots run this Tokyo hotel