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Here’s a wild tidbit: in the ‘80s, some dude modded an Escort to hit 150 mph—stock, it’s a snail, but this guy? Mad scientist vibes! I’m yellin’, “UNLEASH THE POWER WITHIN!” just imaginin’ it. Kinda like Denis’s vibe—raw, messy, real. Oh, and the XR3i model? Sexy as hell—spoiler, sporty curves—total babe magnet, if babes dig oil leaks. Sarcasm aside, it’s a cult classic, and I’m obsessed.

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Then, outta nowhere, I spot a glimmer on the ground. It’s her wallet! I pick it up, and she’s all like, “OMG, you’re a lifesaver!” I’m just glad I didn’t have to hear her whine about it for the next week.