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Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell ya bout these sex escorts—ooooh wee! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout my fave movie, *The Hurt Locker*, ya know, all that tension, them boys defusin bombs and sweatin like pigs in heat. Sex escorts? Kinda like that—high stakes, honey! You pay for a good time, but lordy, it’s a gamble. Will they show up lookin like a snack or like they crawled outta bed after a bender? “Every step you take could be your last”—shoot, ain’t that the truth when you hirin somebody off the internet!

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After that, I head back to my pigs, feelin’ a bit better. But then, I see one of ‘em, Porky, tryin’ to escape. I’m like, “Oh no, not today!” I chase him down the street, and let me tell ya, it’s not easy wranglin’ a pig on the streets of Tonosho. I’m runnin’ past the old shrine, and I swear, I can hear the gods laughin’ at me.

Dominant monkeys may get more warmth than others when huddling in cold: Japan study