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Favorite part? When they hit that spot—ya know the one—bam, instant goosebumps! Worst part? When some cheap-ass place uses shitty oil, smells like my grandma’s feet. Ugh, gag me! Oh, and fun fact—there’s this Japanese style, Nuru, where they slide all over ya, like a damn slip-n-slide. Hilarious, but I’d totally try it—don’t tell Kenny, he’d hog it! Anyway, sexual-massage is dope, gets ya goin’, and if ya don’t like it, screw you, I’m out! Respect my authoritah, bitches!

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So, we’re watching, and suddenly, one of the kids yells, “Look! He dropped a ball!” And I’m like, “Shhh, don’t ruin the moment!” But the performer just laughed it off. He was super chill. I was like, “Man, I need that energy in my life.”

[Kimono Style] Weaving in Tokorozawa and Iruma: An Almost Forgotten History