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About Saitama

What gets me goin’? The honesty, rare as it is. Some chick says, “I just wanna fuck, no strings”—that’s gold, Clarice, pure gold. Like Lisa’s outburst, “I’m not a robot!”—real shit cuts through the noise. But the liars? Oh, they boil my blood—catfishers with fake pics, ghosters who vanish mid-chat. Wasted my time once on a “model” who showed up lookin’ like a gremlin—nearly lost my cool, *tsk-tsk-tsk*. Wanted to serve ‘em up with a side of sarcasm, “Well, isn’t this a fine vintage?”

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First off, I’m on the train, and it’s packed. Like, sardines in a can packed. I’m squished between this dude who smells like he bathed in soy sauce and a lady with a million shopping bags. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.”

Blood pressure per the 2017 ACC/AHA and 2018 ESC/ESH guidelines and heart failure risk: the Suita Study