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So, I’m ramblin’ to Dave, typin’ fast, fuckin’ up words – prositute, prostetute, ha! – coz who cares? “Stay safe, idiot,” I say. “Wrap it up, don’t die.” He’s like, “Thanks, E!” I’m happy he’s not mad, but ugh, still judgin’. Findin’ a prostitute? Pfft, rather watch *White Ribbon* again – way less messy, way more style. “No capes!” – that’s my rule, dahling. Stick to it!

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I rushed to my desk, typing like a madman. My fingers were flying over the keyboard. I was sweating bullets. I mean, who knew spreadsheets could be so intense? I was like, “Why did I choose this job?” But then I remembered the sweet paycheck. Gotta pay the bills, right?