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*Ominous pause* I am your father. Hands kneadin, oil drippin – borderline art. “Certified Copy” vibes – “What’s authentic here?” Movie’s got this chick playin roles. Massage does too – pleasure or just actin? Dunno, but those fingers diggin in? Fuckin galaxy explodes in your head. Once had this masseuse – quiet, sneaky type. Thought she’d suck – nah, blew me away. Happy as hell, floatin like I’m on Bespin. Ever hear bout tantric roots? Old-ass monks started it – freaky, right? Spiritual boners or some shit.

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After that, I’m starving. I hit up this little izakaya on the corner of Otemachi. I order some yakitori and a cold beer. Life is good again. I’m sitting there, just enjoying the food, and I overhear this couple arguing. I mean, c’mon, you’re in Shizuoka! Look at the view! But they’re all like, “You never listen!” I’m just trying to enjoy my chicken, people!

Shizuoka’s local Cherry Beans Potato French fries are just plain devilishly good