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So, I’m layin’ there, right, thinkin’—whoa, this bird’s got skills! Hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension meltin’—shag-tastic! Little known fact—ancient cats in Egypt did this, swear it! Pharoahs got oiled up, feelin’ randy—history’s wild, baby! Makes me happy—stress gone, mojo risin’! But once, this geezer charged me 50 quid—ripoff! Got me mad, yeah—nearly lost my cool, “Danger’s my middle name,” but nah, I’m too fab.

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I’m walking along the beach, trying to shake off the bad vibes. I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re having a blast, and I’m like, “Man, I miss those days.” But then, one of them kicks the ball right at me! I dodge it like a ninja, but I’m still like, “Dude, watch it!” They just laugh. Kids, man.