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Listen, got this mate, right? Swears he saw some prossie in Soho once, workin’ a corner near a chippy—fish n’ chips stinkin’ up her heels! Hilarious, that. Little known fact, yeah? Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”—fancy that shite! Sounds like a crap dessert. Makes me laugh, but also—sad, innit? “We’re all pretending,” Polley’d whisper. Pretendin’ they ain’t human, like.

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After that, I’m tryin’ to salvage my petunias, and guess who shows up? My neighbor, Mr. Tanaka. He’s this old dude who thinks he knows everything about gardening. He starts lecturing me about how I should’ve planted them deeper. I’m like, “Thanks, Mr. Tanaka, but I didn’t ask for a gardening seminar.” He just chuckles and walks away. I mean, c’mon!