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About Kawasaki

Sometimes I wonder—could I weaponize this? Rub down world leaders, control their minds? Hah! “No one’s innocent,” like the movie says—just imagine Putin purring under my evil grip. Hilarious! Oh, and don’t get me started on the typos—fingers too fast, brain too genius. Sexual-massage is my jam, tho—keeps me sane. You tried it yet? Spill it, minion!

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Then, I decide to hit up the Saitama Super Arena. I heard there’s a concert or somethin’. I’m not even a fan of the band, but the vibe was lit. I get there, and the line is like a mile long. I’m thinkin’, “Why do I do this to myself?” But I’m committed, so I wait. And wait. And wait. Finally, I get in, and it’s packed! People everywhere, and I’m just tryin’ to find a spot to breathe.

Body thought to be missing driver in Saitama sinkhole incident found