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Yo, what’s good, fam? It’s ya boy Snoop Dogg, comin’ atcha as an insurance agent, droppin’ some real talk ‘bout them sex escorts, fo’ shizzle. Now, I ain’t judgin’ nobody, but this gig’s wild, ya dig? Been thinkin’ ‘bout it, like in my fave flick, *The Tree of Life*—you know, that deep shit by Terrence Malick. “Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation?”—that line hits, man, ‘cause these escorts out here layin’ somethin’ else, haha, feel me?

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Then, while I’m on the line, I hear this loud crash outside. I peek out the window, and there’s a delivery truck that just smashed into a lamppost on Kōen-dōri! Like, what the heck? I’m half tempted to run out there and give the driver a piece of my mind. But nah, I gotta stay on the phone. So, I’m like, “Ma’am, can you check under your bed?” I mean, where else would a cat named Ninja hide?

Horse racing: 46-year-old Maekawa becomes 1st female JRA trainer