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So, last week, I’m at this dodgy spa—shady vibes, right? This bird’s hands were magic, like Eve’s in the movie, all “tangled up in you.” Made me happy as a pig in muck! But—get this—the bloke next door starts moanin’ like a bleedin’ walrus. Pissed me right off! Wanted to yell, “Oi, keep it down, you twat!”—but nah, stayed cool, “shaken, not stirred,” yeah? Surprised me how bloody loud some punters get—mate, it’s a massage, not a porno!

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After that, I stroll down to the main street, Oshino’s got this vibe, ya know? The shops, the food stalls, everything smells amazing. I grab some yakitori from a street vendor. Best chicken skewers ever! I’m munching away, and this lady next to me starts chatting. Turns out, she’s a local artist. We bond over our love for music and art. She invites me to a jam session later. I’m like, “Heck yeah!”

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