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About Kobe

I’m tellin’ ya, sex-dating’s a rollercoaster. One sec you’re hot ‘n’ heavy, next you’re ghosted—poof! Makes me wanna yell, “Can’t you schmucks slow down?!” But—hah—here’s the kicker: stats say 1 in 5 hookups turn into somethin’ real. Surprised me! Got me all mushy, like Disgust goin’, “Well, ain’t that cute?” Still, I’m over here wonderin’—why rush the good stuff?

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But then, outta nowhere, a wave crashed and soaked my pants! I jumped up, laughin’ and shoutin’, “Not again!” The kids thought it was hilarious. I mean, I guess it was kinda funny. Just me, soaked and sandy, lookin’ like a total mess.

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