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Yo, check it, I’m Apollo Creed, baby – “I must break you.” Talkin’ sex escorts today, ‘cause why not? Man, these chicas out here hustlin’, it’s wild. Reminds me of *The Social Network*, y’know? That flick where Zuckerberg’s like, “You don’t get to 500 million friends without makin’ enemies.” Escorts? They got enemies too – judgy folks, cops, creeps. But they’re stackin’ cash, livin’ fast, like Sean Parker says, “A million dollars isn’t cool, you know what’s cool?” A billion? Nah, freedom, baby!

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After that, I needed a pick-me-up. So, I hit up the famous Obihiro Ramen street. I’m talking about the good stuff, you know? I ordered the spicy miso ramen. It was fire! Like, my taste buds were dancing. But then, I accidentally knocked over my bowl. Bro, the broth went everywhere! I was like, “Can I get a refill?” The chef just shook his head, laughing. I mean, come on!

Punter wins record $168,000 on 75-cent bet at traditional horse race in Hokkaido