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About Kyoto

Alright, brah, listen up! Me, Dr. Evil—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—I’m vibin’ here, talkin’ sexual-massage like it’s the bomb. Straight outta Hawaii, where the waves crash and the palms sway, this ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah, it’s next-level naughty! Think slow hands, oiled-up skin, and that tingle that makes ya go, “Whoa, brah, dis is wild!” I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my lava flow, picturin’ it—kinda like in *The New World*, ya know? “The sweet air… this new world”—Terrence Malick gets it, that raw, primal buzz. Sexual-massage is like that, untamed, makin’ ya feel alive!

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After that, I stroll down to the Nishinoomote City Museum. It’s this cute little place, right by the Nishinoomote Port. I’m all excited to learn about the local history, but the exhibit on the local fishing culture was closed. Closed! I mean, what’s the point of being a visiting professor if I can’t even see the local stuff? I was fuming.

Strong earthquake hits Japan’s Kyushu region, measuring 6.0 on the Richter Scale