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About Saitama

Escorts, they’s everywhere, precious. Web’s crawlin’ with ‘em—X posts too, sneaky ads, hiss! Me eyes, they catch it—split me mind does, one half’s mad, other’s curious. “The jungle hides usss,” like movie says—escorts hide too, in plain sight! Met this bloke once, swore his escort gig funded a zoo trip—saw a tiger, he did! True? Dunno, but funny as hell. Made me grin, yesss, til me teeth hurt.

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Then, I see this food stall on the corner of Shōwa-dōri. I’m starving! I grab some takoyaki. It’s so good, I almost cry. Like, how can something so simple taste so amazing? I’m in heaven. But then, I spill some on my shirt. Ugh! Now I look like a mess.