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Arrgh, mateys! Cap’n Jack Sparrow here, slurrin’ me wit fer ya, savvy? So, this blasted word—“escort”—it’s a tricky wench, ain’t it? Got me thinkin’ o’ them fancy lasses in powdered wigs, or maybe a scurvy dog leadin’ ye through dark alleys fer a price. Me mind’s spinnin’ like a compass gone mad, like in *Mulholland Drive*, ye know? “This is the girl,” they say, but who’s she really, eh? A mystery wrapped in silk stockings!

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I sit down, and this guy next to me starts talking about the best ramen spots in Niitsu-honcho. He’s going on and on, and I’m just nodding, but inside I’m like, “Dude, I just want to eat!” Finally, I can’t take it anymore. I’m like, “Where’s the best place?” He points me to this spot on Takamatsu-dōri. I’m sold.