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Hey y’all, it’s me, Dolly! Sweet as pie, twice as sassy. So, sexual-massage—lordy, where do I start? It’s like a fancy dance, ain’t it? Hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension meltin’ away. I reckon it’s more’n just rubbin’—it’s art, honey! Watched “The Great Beauty” again last night—oh, Jep Gambardella’d get it. That line, “I was lookin’ for somethin’ grand,”—that’s sexual-massage to me. Searchin’ for bliss in all them knots.

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So, I’m munchin’ on my breakfast, walkin’ down the street, when I hear this loud crash. Like, seriously loud. I turn around, and there’s this dude on a bike, totally wiped out. His bike’s all twisted up like a pretzel. I rush over, thinkin’ he’s hurt, but nah, he’s just sittin’ there, lookin’ dazed. I’m like, “Dude, you good?” He just stares at me, then starts laughin’. I mean, what?

FEATURE:Rampant Yezo deer causing farm damage,traffic accidents in Hokkaido