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Funny bit—bloke I know swore his “masseuse” was a Russian spy. Kept muttering about microchips while she worked his back. Reckon he’d had too many vodkas, not stirred enough. Me, I just lean back, let the hands do the talking—shaken, not stirred, naturally. You tried it yet? Get on it, mate—beats dodging Q’s gadgets any day.

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Then, I decide to take a stroll by the river. The Yoshino River is so pretty, man. I’m just chilling, enjoying the view, when I see this group of kids playing. They’re laughing and splashing water everywhere. I can’t help but smile. It’s those little moments, ya know? But then, outta nowhere, one of them throws a water balloon, and it hits me! I’m soaked! I’m like, “Really, kids?!” But I can’t stay mad. I just laugh it off.

Samoan student wins Japanese art award