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What pisses me off tho—dudes who think it’s just a cheap thrill. Nah, brother, it’s deeper! Like in the flick, “What’s buried stays buried”—that’s the stress, man, gone with them magic fingers. Happiest damn moment? When she hit that spot on my back—BOOM—felt like I could bodyslam Andre the Giant again! Surprised me how good it felt, like, whoa, didn’t expect that, brother!

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Then I had to rush to a community meeting at the Niigata City Hall. Traffic was a mess on Bandai Bridge. I swear, I could’ve walked faster. I’m stuck in this jam, and I’m like, “C’mon, people! It’s not rush hour!” Finally, I get there, and guess what? I’m late. Classic me.

Suspect in Kanto robbery spree arrested in Niigata