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Here’s a kicker: in Japan, they got “soaplands”—sexual-massage joints, all legal-like. Slippery, soapy, happy-endin’ fun. Ain’t that a hoot? Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ ‘bout Dubya tryin’ one—me, all oiled up, yellin’, “Mission accomplished!” Ha! But serious, it’s relaxin’, builds trust—kinda like talkin’ to that AI chick in *Her*. “I can’t believe I’m falling for this,” I’d say, half-jokin’, half-sweatin’.

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After that, I head to the Mutsu Museum. I’m a sucker for history. I walk in, and it’s all about the region’s past. I’m readin’ about the Ainu culture, and it’s fascinating. But then, I trip over my own feet. Classic me! I’m sprawled out on the floor, and everyone’s lookin’. I laugh it off, but inside, I’m like, “Why, universe, why?”

Prince Harry shares an emotional reunion with African orphan Mutsu