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So, escort—ooh, fancy word, right? Makes ya think of sleek cars or VIPs, but nah, it’s the oldest gig in the book. I’m talkin’ sex work, baby, paid company, the whole shebang. Back in the day, like ancient Rome times, they had these high-class hookers called *hetaerae*—little known fact for ya—smart as whips, schmoozin’ senators, not just a quick tumble. Kinda badass, right? Made me happy thinkin’ some gals flipped the script on sleazy dudes. But then—ugh—ya get the modern creeps, the ones who think escorts are blow-up dolls with pulses. That pisses me off, like, c’mon, man, have some respect!

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We push through the rain, and I’m trying to keep spirits up. “Hey, at least we’re not in a boring office, right?” Some chuckle, others just glare at me. I mean, c’mon, lighten up! We finally reach this stunning viewpoint on the trail. The clouds clear up, and BAM! The view is like a postcard. I whip out my phone to snap a pic, and guess what? My phone dies. Classic, right?

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