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Pro tip: don’t be a dumbass, use protection, fo’ shizzle. Ain’t tryna catch nothin’ worse than a cold. And don’t fall in love, dawg – that’s a rookie move. This one cat I knew spent his rent on a hooker, cryin’ when she ghosted. I’m like, “Bro, she’s a pro, not your wifey!” Reminds me of *Toni* – “It’s not about winning, it’s about surviving.” Deep shit.

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Then, I meet my first client at a cute little boutique on Nishikata Street. She’s super picky. Like, “I want something unique but not too unique.” What does that even mean? I’m trying to find her a dress, and she’s like, “No, too bright. No, too dull.” I’m losing my mind! I’m like, “Lady, you’re killing me here!”