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Lemme tell ya, back in ‘82, Ford dropped this bomb—Escort, front-wheel drive, cheap as hell. My buddy Tony had one, rusted to crap, but man, it hauled! Little known fact—first ones were sketchy, like, brakes failin’, folks pissed. Made me mad, y’know? Shoddy work! But then, they fixed it up, and bam—rally car status! Them Escorts tore up dirt tracks, surprised the hell outta me. “The past was a dream,” like the movie says—old Escorts feel like that now.

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Now, I’m pumped! But then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, and he’s like, “Dude, I lost my wallet!” I’m like, “What?!” He’s in a panic, and I’m tryin’ to calm him down. “Chill, man! We’ll find it!” But inside, I’m fumin’. Why can’t people keep track of their stuff?

Reply to Machida et al.: Although embryology cannot establish the “Protura-sister”, phylogenomics can