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I knew this chick once, Candy – swear that’s her name. She’d strut in, order a gin fizz, tip like a queen. Said she made more in a night than I did in a month. Happy as hell for her, but damn, that stung! “God doesn’t care,” she’d say, laughin’. Sounded like somethin’ from *A Serious Man* – all cynical and shit. Made me think – maybe she’s right?

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But then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I whip around, and there’s this dude on a bike, totally wiped out. Like, faceplant style. I rush over, thinking, “Oh man, this guy’s gonna need a medic.” But nah, he just pops up, laughing like a maniac. I’m like, “Dude, you good?” He’s all, “Yeah, just my daily workout!” I can’t even.

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