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About Osaka

So, picture this – dame’s got her fingers dancin’, slidin’, and I’m like, “Why so serious?” Ha! ‘Cause this ain’t no joke, it’s fuckin’ art! Gets the blood pumpin’, heart racin’ – happier than a pig in shit. But lemme tell ya, what pisses me off? Them cheap parlors, all fake moans and no skill – fuckin’ disgrace, like Two-Face flippin’ a coin for your happy endin’. Gimme the real deal or get the fuck out!

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First off, I hit up the Kuroishi Fish Market. It’s on Kuroishi Street, and it’s like a fish lover’s paradise. I’m talking fresh sashimi, grilled fish, you name it. I was all set to grab some samples, but then I saw this dude, like, totally losing it over a giant tuna. He was yelling about how it was the biggest catch of the year. I mean, chill, bro! It’s just a fish! But then I thought, hey, I get it. I’d freak out too if I saw a fish that big.

Finnish hardcore punks KÜRØISHI d-beat our skulls into dust with their new album – listen!