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I went to one once—research, fam. Smelled like cheap perfume and regret. This chick, Candy, she’s tellin me bout her “rates”—I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t UberEats!” Got mad for a sec, ‘cause the vibe was off—dude in the corner looked like he’d rob me. But then she laughed, said, “Don’t overthink it, playa.” Straight outta Korine’s script—“Don’t be a little bitch!”—and I’m like, damn, she’s right. Loosened up, tipped her extra. Felt good, like I won somethin.

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my buddy Kenji. He’s all hyped up about some new ramen joint that just opened near the Kuroda River. I’m like, “Dude, I just lost a sandwich to a bird!” But he’s relentless. “C’mon, man! You gotta try it!” So, we head over, and let me tell ya, this place is packed. Like, standing-room-only packed.

Bank of Japan bids final farewell to Kuroda's radical policy experiment