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Hate the fakes tho – blegh! Some escorts, all talk, no spark – borin’! “We’re all going to die!” – yeah, but live a bit first! Real ones? Gold. Chatty, fun, worth the shiny. Me, I’d hire one just to yell at hobbits – “Stupid, fat hobbit!” – and dance ‘round the fire. World’s mad, escorts prove it – love ‘em, hate ‘em, can’t ignore ‘em!

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But then, I realize I’m late for my next auction. I bolt outta there, and I’m sprinting again. I’m thinkin’, “Why do I always do this to myself?” I finally make it, and guess what? I trip on the same cobblestone again! I’m like, “Seriously, Kurashiki? You’re out to get me!”

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