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Wotcha, mate, gather round, listen up! Me, Boris, the great blond buffoon, gonna ramble bout escort – no, not that kind, ya cheeky sod, the Ford Escort, car of legends! Vroom vroom, eh? Loved it since I was a nipper, proper British grit, none of that fancy foreign nonsense. Reminds me of *Inception* – “You musn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling!” – cos the Escort, it’s a dream, innit, simple yet bonkers clever.

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Next, I hit up the local market on Koshigoe Street. It’s buzzing with life! Fresh veggies, fish, and all that good stuff. I’m browsing, and I spot these amazing-looking mochi. I’m like, “Yes, please!” But when I go to pay, my wallet’s gone. Gone! I’m freaking out, searching my bag like a madman. Turns out, it was in my other pocket. Classic me, right?

Acquittal of former Koshi minister Adhikari without court trial draws controversy