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So, escort—man, it’s wild. You ever think about it? Some dude—or chick, whatever—hangin’ on your arm, all dolled up, for cash. It’s like rentin’ a date! I mean, what’s that feel like? Back in the day, they called ‘em courtesans—fancy, huh? Little fact: in old Venice, these gals were, like, cultured—playin’ lutes, writin’ poems. Not just arm candy! Blows my mind. You mad about that? I ain’t—makes me chuckle.

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I’m flipping through their papers, and I’m getting angrier by the minute. I mean, c’mon! You can’t just mess with numbers like that. It’s not rocket science! I’m about to call them out when suddenly, the owner’s kid runs in, all smiles, holding a giant stuffed panda. I can’t help but laugh. Kids, man. They make everything better.

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