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Oh, bit of a giggle – early Escorts had no seatbelts, standard! Mental, innit? Imagine me, Austin Powers, hair flappin’, no belt, just vibes. “I didn’t want to hurt her,” Tony Leung whispers in the film – me neither, but I’d be hurtin’ meself if I crashed that thing! Still, what a beaut – affordable, cheeky, a real ’60s icon. Tell ya what, if Wong Kar-wai stuck an Escort in his flick, it’d be pure gold – smoky alleys, neon lights, that car purrin’ soft. Yeah, baby, I’m sold!

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Anyway, I’m walking down the street, and I see this cute little park, Koga Park. It’s got cherry blossoms, and I’m like, “Aww, this is nice.” But then, BAM! A kid runs by, and I trip over his skateboard. I’m on the ground, and he just zooms off. Rude, right? I’m like, “Hey, kid! Ever heard of ‘watch where you’re going’?” But he’s gone.

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