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About Fukuoka

Me? I’d be yellin’, “This is what we deserve!” Not some billionaire hoggin’ private jets while we’re out here, muscles knotted up, needin’ a $20 rubdown. Had one last week—lady’s hands were magic, like she’s tracin’ tattoos backward, “What’s the combination?” I’m thinkin’, combo to what, my spine? Felt so good I nearly cried—happy tears, not the “I owe rent” kind.

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Then, I hit up the old samurai district, and it’s like stepping back in time. The wooden houses, the narrow streets—so much history! I’m wandering around, and I bump into this old dude. He’s got this epic samurai sword, and he starts telling me stories. I’m all ears, but then he goes off on this tangent about how he once fought a bear. Like, dude, really? A bear? I’m trying to keep a straight face, but inside, I’m dying.

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