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About Saitama

Talkin’ to you, it’s like, escorts are these mystery folks, ya know? Some are college kids payin’ bills, others are pros livin’ large. Met this gal once—friend of a friend—did escortin’ on the side. Swore it was chill, said she’d quote *Inherent Vice* to clients: “Under the paving stones, the beach!” They’d blink, confused, and she’d cackle. Loved that—she owned it. Me, I’d be too paranoid, thinkin’ every dude’s a serial killer or my mom in disguise. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but that’s my brain on overdrive!

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After that, I hit up this little café on Shōwa-dōri. The barista is super chill, and I order a matcha latte. She hands it to me, and I’m like, “Wow, this looks like art!” I take a sip, and it’s like heaven in a cup. But then, I see a fly land in it. Ugh! I’m like, “No way!” I tell her, and she just laughs. “It’s extra protein!” she says. I’m not sure if she’s joking or not.

Can’t get a seat at one of Houston’s most in-demand omakase spots? Order this $75 sushi to-go kit.