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About Nagoya

So sex escort bugs, they’re these funky beetles, right? They’re called Pyrrhocoris apterus—firebugs! Little red dudes with black spots, lookin all snazzy. They don’t fly, just strut around like, “I’m too cool for wings!” And I’m sittin here thinkin, “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” ‘Cause I’m Patrick Star, duh, and I see stuff all goofy-like! These bugs, they bang like crazy, no shame! The dudes just chase the ladies, and it’s all “Wham, bam, thank ya ma’am!”

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Finally, I plop down on a bench in the park, just soaking it all in. The sun’s setting, and the sky is this beautiful orange. I’m thinking, “Kikuchi, you wild little city, you’ve got my heart.” I pull out my phone to text my friends about the day, but then I realize I’ve got no signal. Of course!

Angels land free-agent pitcher Yusei Kikuchi with 3-year, $63M deal