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Personal quirk—I’m imaginin’ the masseuse talkin’ all soft, “Relax, big guy.” Ugh, gag me. Hate that. Exaggeratin’ here, but I’d prolly punch the wall, storm out. “You’ll live your past all over again”—movie again. Sexual-massage sounds like relivin’ a bad date, but stickier. Humor? Sure—imagine me, stone-faced, gettin’ offered “extras.” I’d say, “Keep your hands off, I’m a national treasure.”

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Then, just when I think it can’t get worse, I hear a commotion. I rush out, and there’s a fight breaking out! I’m like, “Not today, fellas!” I jump in, and it’s like a scene from a movie. I’m dodging punches, trying to break it up. Finally, I get ‘em separated, but man, my heart’s racing.

Eiji Karasuyama Ends Lesson of the Evil Manga in June